Talkin' 'Bout my Best Friend
by theevilestgeekofall
Summary: Marshall and his 'sick days'


After watching 'A Walk to Remember' and tearing up a bit, Marshall sprawled on the couch with fingers still tinted Cheeto orange, on his 'sick' day, pondering jellyfish dance battles, Mandy Moore, and life itself. He could be a deep, multi-tasking sort of thinker when he wanted to be. Although he did giggle to himself, imagining dancing jellyfish—they'd probably battle it out with little jellyfish baseball caps turned sideways.

Marshall sighed happily: lazy days like these were what he lived for. Working as someone's spineless bitch wasn't the lawyering career he'd dreamed of…it felt enormously wonderful to take a day off and simply be…Marshall.

In the midst of all of this thinking and silly glee (he was excited to lie to his boss—he wasn't really sick!) the phone rang. Abruptly, Marshall grabbed for it.

"Yeah?" He answered, with a manly gusto he rather enjoyed.

"It's Ted," that monotone, concentrated voice jittered with excitement, "I just met this awesome girl. I think she's The One."

"Dude!" Marshall breathed out, gladness causing his chest to burst, "That's great, Ted. I'm so happy for you."

"Yeah…" Ted breathed out.

"But seriously, is this why you called? Because the commercials just ended, and my show's back on." The channel was playing 'A Walk to Remember' a second time, and he hadn't seen the beginning parts.

Ted just laughed, poking fun at the rebellious edge Marshall got from taking the day off.

"This is my day, man! I gotta go. But seriously, I am so happy for you." He smiled to remember that moment, when he laid eyes on Lily, and he simply knew…

As he cast the phone aside and leaned back into the soft sofa cushions, an odd memory surfaced in Marshall's mind. His smile slowly faded, and once again he found himself glassy-eyed and thoughtful.

It had been years ago—the college years. He and Ted had stayed up late, tired and sleepily sobered from their earlier weed highs hour before. The two of them had just finished laughing at some stupid sitcom—he didn't remember what, as they watched a lot of television back in the day.

Marshall turned, eyes adjusting to the now seemingly pitch black room.

He sat on his bed, next to Ted. He suddenly became weirdly aware of the fact their arms were touching. Ted's arms felt warm and…almost soft. He had this subtle soft quality to him, which reminded Marshall of Lily.

He heard his own breath, along with Ted's. Strange how quickly things can become serious. Marshall's mind started racing, freaking out—_am I gay? No, I couldn't be, but why am I feeling this? OH MY GOD, what would Nana say?_

"Um…Ted?" He whispered out, in the stark silence of those minutes of impending sleep.

"Yeah?" Ted rasped out.

"You're my best friend," he said quickly, looking at his hands nervously.

There was a careful pause, and Marshall didn't dare look into Ted's eyes—dark ones which would surely be glinting in that mystifying and sometimes creepy way of his—

He wasn't turned on. He couldn't be, right? He was straight. Marshall analyzed his mind and knew that he loved Lily. It was stupid. Ted was just his best friend, that's all…

"You're my best friend, too," Ted said lightly, and Marshall almost felt his smile, from inches away. Ted's arm hair suddenly felt electric, like static.

It was then that, awkwardly, a tired Ted swerved over to Marshall, hugging him. Marshall could feel his friend's cheek against his own—that soft arm slung around his neck and shoulders—he was like Lily, he was a musky Lily, abruptly Marshall just wanted to be cradled…or maybe he wanted to hold Ted himself,

No. Oh god, that is absolutely, without a doubt, homosexual, Marshall thought to himself with sudden certainty. He'd had moments like these before he could argue back into the 'really straight and macho' zone…but this?

Ted's hips slid down and he was sitting on Marshall's lap, playfully.

It was then.

Marshall blushed to even remember the moment.

He sensed Ted's face pale and fall.

He felt Marshall's hard dick, uncomfortable with tension.

They looked at each other, and Ted fell to the side of Marshall.

"It's nothing. Just that girl…on the show, you know, is really hot…" Marshall said weakly.

"Yeah…it's no big deal." Ted whispered out.

They fell asleep not long after this, and never discussed the event, ever again.

The present Marshall, now still stretched out on that saggy sofa, felt his dick harden to picture Ted on his lap.

It was his sick day. Nobody else was home. He could just let his mind float over to those dirty, horrible thoughts he sometimes had.

He got up and locked the front door. Then, sitting on the couch, he pictured Ted, perched on his lap, kissing him—their tongues swirling. Marshall had his arms wrapped around those small shoulders. He felt Ted _down there_, he started kissing Ted's neck, softly, feeling him moan against his eager lips and tongue.

Marshall pulled out his stiff and pleading member, furiously pumping his skin. His ass tightened and his hips thrust and he groaned when he came.

He loved Lily. He did.

But he and Ted were best friends. It was like the movie said, "one soul in two bodies," or whatever. Or maybe they weren't exactly that, but Marshall…

"Oh my GOD!" Marshall jumped up, as he always did after countless similar fantasies. "What have I done, what have I done?"

He leapt to the kitchen to make guilty brownies. As he churned the ingredients together in a plastic bowl, Marshall thought about how much he loved Lily, how much he really loved Lily.

"Hey—" Marshall heard Ted behind the door, pounding on the door.

"Give me a second," Marshall called.

"You're not angry, are you?" Ted asked nervously, dark eyes looking into Marshall. All guilt seeped out of his brain to look into the depths of those brown eyes. "I mean, this was only ever a fling, right?"

"Of course," Marshall said. "It's just, you know, a stupid weird habit. You know. We're both the straightest dudes on the planet. We're just horny, you know? I love Lily, and you have..."

"Ruth," Ted sighed out. "You still want to fuck?" He asked bluntly, grinning.

"Of _course_!" Marshall said, crazy happy, and they lumbered off to Ted's room.

"I love it when you have 'sick days,'" Ted remarked, diving in for a kiss.

"Hey, wouldn't it be awesome if jellyfish had dance battles?" Marshall asked, after minutes of lips and tongue. He felt silly.

Ted cackled, eyes sparkling. "Dude, that would _probably_ be the best thing _ever_." His eyes crinkled up, in the same way Lily's did. Ted's fingers felt cool and silky, inching up Marshall's shirt.


End file.
